Monday, March 26, 2012

I Already Know...

Lately, I've done some questioning. I mean, God's timing doesn't always seem to line up very well with my timing. It is so hard to not get discouraged when things don't go as I've planned. I mean, this summer. I have no idea what I'm going to do. The classes that I need to graduate aren't offered in the summer (downside to a small college). So, I'm hoping for an internship. I've always said my dream was to work in children's ministry- but, there aren't that many full time children's minister jobs that would higher a straight out of college, no experience (aside from a stint as an intern), female (sorry, I can't be a "good husband and father". I'm a girl). So, I'm starting to look into youth ministry- specifically middle school. Not what MY plan was, but God provides.
I find myself wondering why my timing and God's aren't aligning. I mean, it's spring. No ring. Everyone is getting engaged or married. My heart's desire is to be a mommy and wife someday. While my daddy tells me I can cancel on our weekly lunch date if a "hot date" comes up...it hasn't happened yet. I'm not giving up hope (I'm only 21 for goodness sake!), it gets frustrating. And then, I think back to the book of Job. My "hard times" are nothing compared to his. Boils. Dead children. Mad wife. Bad friends. You get the picture. He starts complaining to God, then God steps in. It says in my Bible "then God spoke". I think that was a powerful and scary moment. He says, " Look Job. Where we're you when I set this world into motion? Where we're you when I laid the very foundation? Who are you to question the almighty God?" (super paraphrased).
I can hear God saying the same to me sometimes. He speaks and says,"Lauren, where were you when I created this world? Where were you before time began? Who are you to question my timing?" I mean, it sounds a little silly. Genesis 1 and 2 tell us the story of creation. It's an amazing story. How God could make something from nothing is beyond me. I seem so small. He knows what's going on. He has a plan. Who am I to question the one who already knows everything? One of my favorite songs is "I Already Know" by Mandi Mapes. In the song, she writes,
I already know who's gonna save you. I already wrote, the end of the story. You were made for me and I'll never leave you. In the end, you will be happy. In the end, you will be with me. In the end, it's all for my glory.

Trust God. He's been around a little longer than you have. He knows a little more than you know. Don't doubt his faithfulness, because he's promised that he will stay with you.
That he will love you. Forever.
That he will never leave you. Ever.

2 comments:

  1. You have no idea how much I needed this.

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  2. Lauren, sometimes I get frustrated by my lack of relationships/dates too! Here's what helps me and I hope it helps you too! I just kinda have this little chat with myself----Kayla, what do you want?a relationship or a relationship that honors the Lord?
    Answer- a God honoring relationship!
    Well, God honoring relationships are created by God, for God, and in God's timing!


    It's just a quick little way that helps take the pressure off of me----it's all God! Its just my job to TRUST and OBEY!

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