Tuesday, December 14, 2010

A chore.

I think I figured out my blogging slump. I've been trying for weeks to come up with "the-next-greatest-post-ever-in-the-history-of-mankind" and I came to a realization.

I don't have it. 


Why do I blog? Is it because all of my new blog friends? Is it to tell family members what's going on in my life? Is it to provide another outlet for my parent's to stalk me on? Really. Why do I blog? I used to find a hug joy when it came to blogging. Now, I'm pretty sure it just feels like "Oh no. I need to blog again. Or else people might get bored." I mean, I feel this huge  responsibility to entertain you. Seriously.

The greatest post ever written can't come from me. It can only come from God. I mean, he wrote the greatest story ever told. He speaks through writers, yes. But, I can't write that post. He can choose to do something through me, but I can't do it alone. So, I'm returning back to the basics.

But, today, I had a grand reality check. I realized that ultimately the reason I blog is to bring glory to Christ. I mean, if you look at some of the posts I've written in the past (um, back this summer), I blogged a lot about what God was doing in my life and the things I was discovering in His Word and what-not. But now? My posts are full of fluff. I mean, I feel like some of the glory is going to the Big Guy, but not all of it. Most of the glory is going right here. To this girl. And to someone who suffers from a lack of humility...that's not a great thing. Nope. Not good.

A couple things brought me to this.
First, this wonderful blogger girl named Annie wrote a post that really got me thinking. Not just about blog related things. Real life things (Yes, I have a real life. I don't live in a computer!). I kind of want to copy/paste it here because it's so...real...but that would probably be plagiarism, so I'll just encourage you to click that little link up there. Plus it saves me time. But, I will copy a line from her tumblr that talks about that really struck me.

She says, "I believe singleness is a gift even when it isn’t easy, that faith is a journey, and that it isn’t until i lose my life that i find it." I know, the lack of being in a serious, engaged-type, pretty-much-married relationship at the tender age of twenty doesn't condemn you to a life of misery. Or singleness. Or mean that you won't ever meet Prince Charming. But...let's just talk for a minute. I know of four people that graduated from high school at the same time as me that have gotten engaged in the last two weeks. Not even kidding. While I don't think getting married during college is a great idea...it's a little hard when everyone else is. I mean, I know that God has a plan for my life, but that doesn't make it easier when I'm sitting around with friends and everyone's talking about candlelights and such. Faith is a journey. Right now, I'm at the point in my journey where God is asking me to lay "that dream" aside. He's got it under control. I need to place "that dream" on the alter and give it to God and let Him work it out in his time. We all have different things to lay down. For me? It's that whole "you're supposed to have a ring on it by the end of Junior Year". I'm just thinking that one's not gonna happen. (And by the way- I really did have a "3 year plan" that was formulated during my Freshman Year in college. It was planned out on the top of a parking deck and everything. I had dates and deadlines.Let's just say...it didn't all go as planned. Haha. God's funny like that.) So. I'm here. Where I'm at. For a reason. That is still unknown to me. But, that's okay. Because I'm just going to serve my God with abandon and let Him iron out all the details. :)


Secondly, there's a bible verse I have hanging on my bulletin board. It's actually a paraphrase, but I like the wording better. 
"Seize the day! You were born now and positioned where you are for such a time as this. -Esther 4:14"
It reminds me I am here for a reason. That reason is not to be a princess. It's not to have fun. It's not to be crafty/creative. It's to bring glory to God and serve him. I am here for such a time as this. There is meaning to my life. I think that is simply amazing. God created me and God created you for a reason. We're not here to aimlessly wander the Earth. There's a reason. There's a purpose. Think about Esther. It wasn't always easy for her. I mean, she had to go before the king and tell him that basically his number 2, his confidant, Haman was trying to kill her people. And if that's not hard enough- oh yeah, there's the threat of death for entering the king's court without being summoned. But, God had a greater plan and he had it all under control. He placed Esther in her situation for such a time as that. He places us in our individual situations for such a time as this.

And, that's all for now. 

7 comments:

  1. I love this! That bible verse is such a good reminder :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Whoa! Is someone telling you that I stalk you. :-)

    At first when I saw the title I thought you were cleaning up your room. :-)

    Love you.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I love this post. I've written a few "why do I blog?" posts lately and I feel like I am finally starting to get back to the real reason why I blogged. Thank you for sharing your heart.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Lauren. this post is phenomenal. i love it. you are so right. i am coming to this realization myself, that blogging, and all of life, is about Jesus and not me. whatever platform i have, whatever message i bring, is all because He has blessed me with it.

    thank you so much for the mention! i teared up and even cried a little when i saw it. really. the post you linked to refers to something that has had my heart raw and aching for a while. you have no idea how you mentioning my humble little heart cries touches me. it was like God saying, "you aren't alone. I am here, for you and with you. My people are here, for you and with you."

    you are welcome to excerpt and/or copy/paste from my blog posts whenever you like. :]

    also, i was looking at your website a couple days ago, and saw you'd mentioned you didn't know how to change your blog post font to century gothic, and i was like, "hey, i know how to do that!" i was going to email you about this, but i didn't know if your email was still the same it was this past summer. so i'll just post it here if that's okay.

    when you go under "designs" to "edit html" you'll see a big block of text almost right away, the top line of which reads: "/* Variable definitions"
    all the lines after that apply to colors. the first which applies to font is this one:

    ""

    yours should have a different font name after "value="normal normal #%"; change it to "century gothic." change it in the same places in the next couple lines, which apply to sidebar title and text, header, and footer font. i hope this helps!

    also - i have been horrible at commenting on your blog lately. i'm sorry. i will do a better job of that from this point on. also, i apologize for the length of this comment - i feel like it was way longer than a comment should be!

    ReplyDelete
  5. p.s. i hope the html shows up - i didn't get a chance to preview it before the comment was submitted for moderation! if it doesn't, just let me know and i'll repost that part, and make sure i hit "preview" before i hit "post comment."

    ReplyDelete
  6. LOVE this! And I love reading Annie's blog as well!

    ReplyDelete
  7. I feel you, Lauren! Except instead of engagements, all my friends are having babies while we're having problems. I know that it's all in God's hands, but it's still frustrating sometimes... Thanks for sharing though. Esther's my favorite Bible story. :) Have you seen the movie they did? I think it's called "One Night with the King" or something like that. It was pretty good.

    ReplyDelete