Monday, October 24, 2011

big decisions.

I have some huge decisions to make in the coming days. It's really scary and I think it's finally hitting me that I'm really about to grow up. The Spring schedule has been posted on my school's website, so of course I am hard at work deciding what classes to take and what my semester is going to be like next Spring. I have two major options at this point, and I really don't know which one to choose.

  1. 12 hours this Spring/ 12 hours next Fall- This is the option I've been planning on since last Spring. I've pretty much thought it was impossible for me to graduate on time due to changing my major five times, changing colleges three times, and taking a semester off. This would definitely mean less work than option two, which would provide me with more time. The downside is that I still cannot keep interning (at least during the week) at my church because of the way classes fall. 
  2. 21 hours this Spring- This one sounds scary and intimidating. And it totally would be. But, I've looked it up and as long as I get everything approved, I can take up to 22 credit hours (and I only need 21). Downside is that all of the classes I have left are upper level Religion classes and a philosophy class. I'm more than a little frightened that I could get overwhelmed with everything- which I don't want. But, this would mean I wouldn't have to stick around an extra semester. But, this also means I have to figure out the Grad School Dilemma sooner rather than later.
So, as you can clearly see...I'm a little freaked out. I wasn't anticipating on things working out this way. I wasn't anticipating having 21 hours fall in my lap that didn't all happen at the same time. I was planning on taking an easy 12 and interning- but now that there is no way for me to do the latter...what should I do? I don't really have much of a social life as it is, but on the other brain is about fried from all of this theology this semester. Eek. Big decisions. I have a week or so to figure it out (and pray about it and talk to advisers and stuff), but this definitely changes things. I know that God has a plan for my life and I'm really trying to discern what it is. I mean, the job market isn't great right now...but is it going to be any better in December 2012 vs May 2012? I still am not sure what I want to do. I mean, I want to be a Children's Director. I want to disciple children and teach them all about Jesus and how he wants a relationship with each one of them. But, I also want to be able to pay the bills. Do I go to grad school? What do I go to grad school for? Do I stay on a ministry path, or do I try the Social Work route? What's the best time of year to enter one of these programs? Decisions, decisions. 

I've really been dwelling on the following verse this week.
"For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." -Jeremiah 29:11
I know that God has a plan. I know that he already knows what is going to happen. I have faith that he will take care of me as I head out into "the real world". But, it is scary. It's scary not knowing what is the best thing to do. I just have to remember that God's plan is not to harm me. He has my best interests at heart. It may not be easy, but it will be so worth it. He knows my future, so I can have hope. I can rest secure knowing that the God of the Universe holds my world in his hands. 


  1. BIG things. I will pray that the Lord brings you to the right decision that you can have peace over!

  2. it's like we're twins :) i'm having the same issue. i've been planning on being done next spring, but thats with a HUGE load to take on, and now i'm wondering if i should take it easy...but i just want to finish :/
    God has got us girlfriend :) that i know.